Stress Management Articles

 

Feel the Fear and DON'T Do it Anyway
By Amy Phillips-Gary

Lately it seems to me-- from observing others and my own self-- that there is an overabundance of fear, worry and even panic about. It's almost as if the United States has become the land of the worriers and the home of the fearful.

And it's making us sick.

I'm not a scientist or a health care professional, but I can't help but wonder if there is a link between all of this fear and worry about the economy and the recent
outbreak of the "swine flu."

In fact, even before the economy took a nosedive, fear ran rampant. I could blame it on the media-- and they have certainly played a central role in spreading fear of many kinds.

Terror alerts and crime sprees have tended to make front covers or be the lead stories for many years now.

Today you can follow the spread of swine flu on the interactive maps kept up to date by certain media outlets.  Even the funnies are not so funny these days as comic strip characters lose their life savings and try to make do with less.

Even if you eschew the news, as I usually do, it's easy to join in with the worry and fear. After all, there are plenty of unpleasant and upsetting things going on in the
world. And some of these happenings are touching our own lives.

I know people who have been laid off and the uncertainty of the job market is of very personal concern for me. When I look around, it is plain to see that real people are suffering.

This certainly triggers a clenching in my gut and a tightening of my shoulders.

The Effects of Fear
But when I feel fear or worry, I know that I can't thrive the way I want to. Scientific studies have shown that stress causes chemical changes in the brain that have a
direct influence on the state of a person's health.

This might manifest as high blood pressure which can lead to stroke or heart disease or a weakened immune system resulting in the body's inability to fight off viruses and disease.

In a report from the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, around 70-80% of all doctor visits in the country were due to stress-related illnesses.

Although stress and fear are not the same, they are closely linked. In fact, one source describes stress as a "mild form of fear." If you've ever felt stressed out or
fearful, you probably need no convincing from scientific studies or government reports to know that...

Fear and stress feel bad and can even make you sick!

Recognize when you're feeling fear and pause.
There's a popular saying and book that advise, "Feel the fear and do it anyway." I have to disagree! Instead, I think that when you feel fear, it might be more beneficial to you to stop and explore your feelings before you proceed.

Too many of us forge ahead despite what our gut feelings are trying to tell us. How many times have you dismissed some gnawing pull to hold back or take a different path but you pushed on anyway?

And how many times has that pushing ahead led you to messes and upset?

Spiritual teacher Abraham explains that our feelings are indicators of how split off we are from who, what and where we really want to be. When fears arise, it is time to look within at the indicators you are being shown.

I do appreciate the intention that seems to be behind the "Feel fear and do it anyway" suggestion. There are certainly times when we use our fears and self-doubt as a sort of excuse to remain frozen or stuck where we are-- no matter how dissatisfying the status quo might be.

Of course those who have bravely stepped into the unknown of their lives were probably doing so with butterflies and perhaps even some amount of nervousness.

For example, those amazing naturalists who handle venomous snakes or snapping crocodiles absolutely feel an adrenaline rush and perhaps some degree of nervous excitement.

But they probably know that if they stay calm, confident and respectful of the power of the animal they are dealing with, it's more likely all involved will not be harmed.

Acknowledge how you feel. Try to stay focused in on your feelings more than the thoughts you might attach to your feelings. When you encounter a wave of fear, create space and time to nurture yourself.

Figure out what is soothing to you when you are fearful or worried and then remember to care for yourself in those ways. I find that deep breathing and grounding myself in the present moment are both helpful.

When I notice that I am feeling fearful, I re-direct my attention to my body. I inhale and exhale, feeling my feet on the ground or tuning in to my body being supported by the bed or chair upon which I'm resting.

I visualize the oxygen moving throughout my whole body and I remind myself that I am here right now. I also allow myself to be supported spiritually and open up to receive that support.

The first step is to realize that you are feeling fear, worry or stress. The second step is pause and take the time to feel what you are feeling and soothe yourself.

Change your story.
We've all got stories-- those "truths" we tell ourselves that may or may not be as solid and irrevocable as we see them in a particular moment. It is almost always the stories we tell ourselves that fuel the fears which can end up making us sick or that hold us back from the lives we desire.

When you are in the throes of intense emotions, your story can get in the way of you soothing yourself and coming into a more ease-filled state of being. Your story can also keep you stuck in the limited place you might like to move out of.

This is why it can a powerful practice to tune in to your emotions and set aside your story.

But if you allow yourself to maintain a truth or story that doesn't support you moving in a direction you want to go, you'll probably return to the stress, fear and worry
relatively quickly.

When you are feeling relatively calm, take a look at your story. Perhaps your story is one you read about in a newspaper or heard from a friend. Don't make it your goal to "find out the real truth."

Instead, decide what you'd like your new story to be.

If you look around, there are many truths out there in the world. There are people who are living abundantly in a struggling economy and there are those who are going bankrupt.

There are plenty of people whose bodies are healthy and functioning optimally and there are others who feel sick and seem to catch any virus floating around.

The possibilities are truly endless-- but only if you believe them to be. Figure out what it is that you want and create a story in your mind to fit your new truth. Pay
particular attention to the signs you are getting in "real life" that bolster your new story.

As you line yourself up emotionally and vibrationally, you can more easily line up with improved opportunities. As you feel improvement, you will undoubtedly feel less fear, more relaxation and excitement and you'll be positioned to allow your new story to come alive for you.
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Amy Phillips-Gary is a free-lance writer, homeschool mom and
personal growth adventurer.