Personal growth and self improvement articles on relationships and fun

Relationship Articles

How Having Fun Can Be Contagious and Help You Create
the Relationships and Life That You Want
By Susie and Otto Collins

Recently, we went to dinner at a local restaurant with
a few friends who were visiting from out-of-town.

Since this is a very popular place to eat, we were told that the wait
would be 30-40 minutes. While we were waiting to be seated,
we talked, laughed, had fun and even sang and danced to
the music that was playing in the background.

Although the hostess thought we were acting very strangely
for seemingly normal adults in their 30's, 40's and 50's, she
began having fun with us, as well as some of the other people
who were waiting with us.

As we were seated well under the 30-40 minute wait, we
continued our fun with the waitress as we ordered and ate our
food. The owner, who had looked stressed when we came in,
began joining in our fun and even posed with us for a group photo.

What that taught us is how infectious fun, laughter and a positive
frame of mind is and how it can affect those around us and the
situations we find ourselves in.

We could have gone to the restaurant, been upset by the
wait and grumbled about our situation but we had it as our
intention to have fun, enjoy ourselves and have a great meal.
It's no coincidence that that's exactly what happened.

Okay, you're probably wondering what does this have to do
with creating better relationships?

Just like in our example-- The answer is--that we can use the
power of our intentions to create relationships that are filled
with more of what we want rather than what we don't want.

Great relationships are created by your intentions, focus,
attitude and strategies and skills that you practice moment
by moment.

So often we either have no positive intention for our experiences
or because of negative talk in our heads, we focus on what
can go wrong.

People often consciously or unconsciously create atmospheres
of fear and distance with the people in their lives. What we have
discovered is that it's just as easy to create an atmosphere of fun,
love and connection as it is to create relationships filled with what
we don't want.

Some of you might be asking--if it's so easy, why doesn't
everybody do it?

Many of us have been "programmed" to look for problems before
they happen and to focus on what is "wrong" with the situation and
not what is "right." Also, as painful as it is to admit, some people
hang onto relationships and situations that don't serve them
because there's some underlying payoff for being the victim or
martyr.

That all sounds pretty cruel to say but sometimes this
"programming" is so deep within us that we don't even realize
what's going on.

Here are a few suggestions for creating more positive relationships
and a happier, more fulfilled life:

1. No matter what the situation or relationship, create your
intention for what you want. It doesn't have to be elaborate. It can
simply be saying to yourself--"Here's what I want to happen...." and
be excited about it. Actively begin focusing on what you want for your
experiences and not what you don't want.

2. Stay open to new possibilities for your relationships and your
life. If you intend what you want to happen but are not open to the
possibility that your life or relationships can change, they won't. Keep
the past in the past and stay focused on the present.

3. Make having fun a priority in your relationships and in your
life. Having fun means different things to different people. Figure out
what having fun means to you and do those things and create those
experiences on a regular basis.

A friend of our once commented to us that life is one big adventure.
We'd like to add that life can be filled with joy or filled with pain
and the choice is up to you.

We lovingly invite you to take one step--even a small one-- toward
creating what you want this week.

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Susie and Otto Collins are Relationship and Life Success Coaches, authors of 6 books on relationships and life partners. In addition to having a great relationship, they regularly write, speak and conduct seminars on love, relationships and personal growth. To read more free articles like this or to sign up for their free online newsletters visit

http://www.collinspartners.com and http://www.personalgrowthplanet.com

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© 2003-2008 Personal Growth Planet - -
A Service of Relationship Coaches Susie and Otto Collins
P.O. Box 14544
Columbus, Ohio 43214
(614) 459-8121